No lease roommate eviction for nonpayment ?

[NearandFar]

I've lived with someone for the past 11 months who has a month to month payment agreement with the landlord. I don't think there's an actual lease. The landlord has known I'm living here since the beginning.

Lawyer bills from my divorce case have left me really short on money, and I haven't been able to pay January's rent. I also missed about a week's worth of rent last month.

My new boyfriend has been a real comfort to me, but we can't stay at his place much. He lives with a bunch of other guys, and I'm uncomfortable being the only woman there. He's not able to help me out financially, because he can barely pay his own bills.

My roommate keeps pressuring me for the money, which I don't have yet. I keep telling her that I'll take care of it as soon as I can. Now she's complaining about my boyfriend, who works only some days and keeps her company in the daytime, until I get home from work. She amost never even leaves the place herself. She says she needs the apartment to herself in the daytime, but she had a friend staying here nearly fulltime for six months. She yells and screams and tells us we're too noisy. My boyfriend has been more than willing to cook for all of us, as well as doing a lot of the shopping, but she still gripes about his drinking and mine as well. Tells us she can't be around liquor because it encourages her to drink as well. We share what we've bought, but she's not as generous with her wine.

I've put a lock on my bedroom to keep her from going in when I'm not there and opening my window. She complains that with my door closed, the house is too dark and stuffy.

She even called the police on me when I lost my temper after her goading me for hours! I can't afford problems in that area.

What protections do I have against her throwing me out? Are there procedures she needs to follow?

[TenantNet]

Look at the Roommate thread in the Reference section of the Forum.

[NearandFar]

Thanks for the suggestion.

I've revisited the Roommate thread, but still don't see any postings addressing my particular rights, nor the roommate's responsibilities.

For example,

I live outside of NYC, in Dutchess County. The Attorney General doesn't give legal advice. Legal Aid says they can't help me until I'm served. I'd like to avoid court proceedings.

How much notice is required for her to demand payment? (3 days?)
Can I repay her gradually?
What form should her notice take?
Does she have to go to Housing Court first?

Does she have grounds for eviction? (boyfriend/drinking/noise/smoking in the house)?

How much notice for eviction? (one month?)
What form should her notice take?
Does she have to go to Housing Court first?

We've gotten along really well in the past, but there's been lots of arguing and accusations flying, as well. When things started getting really rough, I lived there on my security a few months back, so there's no wriggle room in that area.

She says she's been more than generous, but I still need a place to live/time to find something affordable.

What recourses do I have?